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Members saying Hello

If you are a new member, and plan on sticking around here for a while, introduce yourself! Tell us a bit about yourself! (We get LOTS of new people, so please understand if no one replies right away.)
Ella
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Location: Virginia, USA

Re: Members saying Hello

Post by Ella » Tue Mar 28, 2017 4:56 pm

Hi, Doggie and Arus, it is so nice to meet you both and I can understand your views and have great respect for your opinions. I would like to point out that Mack's father may have "considered" himself a Christian, but he was actually not a Christian or he could never have done the terrible things he did. People such as him are the ones who give true Christians a bad name. I on the other hand personally know many good Christians (believers) who are as close to Christ as can be. It all depends on who one knows I guess. I am both a Christian and a born-again believer with a very close personal relationship with Jesus. I love that the book stressed over and over that God loves all of us and Jesus loves all of us and the Holy Spirit loves all of us. The characters at first seemed a little strange, but I grew to love them as I continued to read the story. The fact that Mack was able to forgive first his father and then the killer is saying a lot for him. I daresay that most people would find it nearly impossible to forgive these two (especially the killer).

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Arus
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Joined: Fri Jan 27, 2017 4:21 pm
Location: South Africa

Re: Members saying Hello

Post by Arus » Tue Mar 28, 2017 5:43 pm

It's good to see you back here :) My name is Peni, by the way. I must say, it was only after reading this book that I truly understood what the Trinity was all about!
In the cracks of an earthquake, new flowers grow.

Doggie
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Re: Members saying Hello

Post by Doggie » Wed Mar 29, 2017 3:10 am

I have experienced a supernatural ability to forgive. I believe that if we are willing, God enables us to forgive and even reach out in love. I have to say that it wasn't my power that gave me the ability to forgive some people in my past it was a work of the Holy Spirit.
It is no longer I who lives, but Christ who lives in me.

Ella
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Joined: Mon Mar 27, 2017 1:59 pm
Location: Virginia, USA

Re: Members saying Hello

Post by Ella » Wed Mar 29, 2017 3:18 pm

Even though I have been surrounded by loving family and friends, there are a couple of people in my past that I know I need to forgive for hurting some of my loved ones as well as myself. (Not a physical hurt but more emotional). So far, I have not been able to forgive and I hope and pray I can experience this power to forgive.

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Arus
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Re: Members saying Hello

Post by Arus » Wed Mar 29, 2017 4:46 pm

Do it for yourself, not them. You will feel much better!
In the cracks of an earthquake, new flowers grow.

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Papalovesyou
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Re: Members saying Hello

Post by Papalovesyou » Wed Mar 29, 2017 7:32 pm

A few thoughts on forgiveness:

Often we have a given expectation of someone, and as humans, they will let us down. This may cause us pain, but in the end we need to own our expectations. It can sometimes be tricky to separate that from boundaries.

Boundaries are things we need to erect and maintain, to keep us physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually safe. We need to stand firm and make others aware of when they have crossed a boundary. An example is abusive language, or personal verbal attacks. We can state we will separate ourselves from the speaker if they cannot respect that boundary. We need to be able to walk away however, or we allow the speaker to encroach on our boundary. Another way of saying this is "your freedom stops at my nose".

Unmet expectations are not the same as boundary issues. I may have an expectation in a friend or fellow Christian, that they behave in a given way, that they follow a given doctrine, that they live out their espoused beliefs. I want to be clear - I have no business coming between a believer and Papa! I can proffer my experience in the Dance with the Trinity, but my contribution stops there, I have no responsibility for their spiritual welfare. We have to be careful to leave the work of the Holy Spirit to the Holy Spirit.

So how does this relate to forgiveness? And how does forgiveness differ from reconciliation? Unmet expectations may appear the same as boundary injuries, at least as far as the pain encountered, but they need to be dealt with two separate ways. We need to be clear within ourselves that we had expectations the other party is unwilling or unable to meet. We need to either drop or significantly modify these expectation - for our own emotional health.

Now about boundary issues. Once apprised of a boundary issue the other party may indeed cause us internal strife, and actually block our ability to give and receive Love. It is then important we release the other person from our anger - freeing us up to return to the great Dance. This does not absolve the injuring party, it simply releases the negative energy we would otherwise hold. I loved the word picture of holding ones hands around the neck of the party who has crossed our boundary keeping us from holding up our hands towards Papa, our loving Father. Think of a picture of a child reaching their arms towards their parent, only to have someone block their path. We must not allow the anger we would direct towards the other party to act as that obstacle in our path to the Father.

Now onto reconciliation. If the injuring party can take responsibility for the injury, an agreement can be reached to rebuild trust, acknowledging that this may take time, or may take a certain amount of milestones, depending on how serious the boundary injury was, and how much love is allowed to flow between both parties. Our responsibility here would be (cautiously) open to true and total reconciliation. Where serious boundary injury occurs I believe true reconciliation will be a supernatural event. And I think Papa is OK with that.

So I can think many would or should forgive the two men mentioned in the Shack. (to free their hands being around the neck of the wrongdoer, and allow them to reach to Papa). Reconciliation is an entirely different matter. Forgiveness is for the person wronged, to free them from dwelling on the hurt and accompanying negative energy.

Blessings,
Papalovesyou
May we all come to know Papa as we are known... and see ourselves as He sees us!

Ladylouwolf
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Re: Members saying Hello

Post by Ladylouwolf » Wed Mar 29, 2017 8:29 pm

Hello!!!
Loved the book and movie! It is changing my life in many ways as a Survivor of Abuse and PTSD. Hugs

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Arus
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Location: South Africa

Re: Members saying Hello

Post by Arus » Wed Mar 29, 2017 8:44 pm

Hello Ladylouwolf, welcome to the forum! I am so glad your life is changing!
In the cracks of an earthquake, new flowers grow.

Ladylouwolf
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Joined: Sat Mar 25, 2017 4:35 am

Re: Members saying Hello

Post by Ladylouwolf » Wed Mar 29, 2017 10:34 pm

Thank you Arus for your warm welcome! These are difficult times but by God's grace I will get through this.! God bless you my new friend.

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Arus
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Location: South Africa

Re: Members saying Hello

Post by Arus » Thu Mar 30, 2017 5:51 pm

Ladylouwolf wrote:
Wed Mar 29, 2017 10:34 pm
These are difficult times but by God's grace I will get through this
You will indeed! God bless you too :)
In the cracks of an earthquake, new flowers grow.

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